Author: Mari Walker

In the summer of 2020, when my mother was sick, I prayed every day for God to heal her. I prayed, my family prayed, and people from church prayed but in the end, she still passed away. After her death, I found myself wondering if part of it was my fault. I remembered the verses in the Bible of Jesus performing miracles and healing the sick or bringing the dead back to life, and all they needed to do was to have faith. So I blamed myself for not having enough faith. I blamed myself for thinking “What if she dies?” “What if she never recovers?” I blamed myself for letting those thoughts slip in, and by doing that, ruining her healing. But the thing is, I really believed she was going to get better. So then I asked myself “What’s the point of having faith if in the end she still died?” “What is faith? Why does it matter?” and “If we are never guaranteed an outcome, what is the point of believing so strongly and letting ourselves be so vulnerable?” 

So what is faith? Is faith even real? We usually use our senses as proof that something is real. We believe something exists because we can see, smell, hear, taste, or touch it. But faith is not something evident to our senses – not always, anyway. There are accounts of more tangible encounters with the Holy Spirit in scripture and in testimonies of people’s personal experiences. The Pentecost story is such a scripture. John Wesley’s “strange warming” of his heart during a worship revival is an example of personal testimony to the ways in which humans can, at times, experience God in a more physical way. For most of us, though, faith is something to practice without seeing, hearing, tasting, or touching.

Because of that, faith can sometimes feel senseless and unreasonable. Having faith feels like believing in a fairytale that promises everything will work out exactly how we want it to. However, life is not perfect, we experience hardships, and things don’t always end up how we plan. This does not discredit faith. Hebrews 11:1 defines faith as “the assurance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” The chapter goes on to name different ways our ancestors had faith. From Noah and the ark to Abraham offering Isaac up as a sacrifice, these people believed in God even when it was tough. They left their homes and families, gave up their worldly possessions, and allowed themselves to be ridiculed by others all because they had an “assurance of things hoped for.” They had faith in the future and believed good things would come.

I know we have all been told this, but I am saying it again: God has a plan for our lives. And all those people believed in his plan. Later in Hebrews 11 it says “They all died in faith, although they had not received the things that were promised. But they saw them from a distance, greeted them, and confessed that they were foreigners and temporary residents on the earth.” These people all understood that God’s plan is much bigger than us. They knew his love for us does not stop at the bounds of our time on Earth, but instead extends to all eternity. Because of this, even in their suffering, all these people in the Bible continued to put their faith in God. They let themselves be vulnerable in faith because they knew he is all-knowing and wants what is best for us. Christ calls us to follow in their steps and walk with him.

However, faith is not an easy thing to have. It is extremely difficult to put our trust in God, especially when it feels like nothing is going right in our lives. But with constant connection and devotion to God, trusting in him becomes an easier thing to do. When we build a relationship with God, he becomes someone we can trust. He becomes the first entity we can turn to when things get hard. Sometimes it might be difficult to try to build a relationship with God. It might feel like our prayers are falling on deaf ears and there is no use in going to church. It may be easy for us to get wrapped up in our lives and forget that God is in charge. Because of this, God shows himself to us in many ways. Sometimes, we can experience God through our friends, family, and others in our lives. Whenever someone is still able to smile even in tough times. We see Him in the promise of a rainbow after a storm. And even in the simple moments in life when it feels like everything is just right. Those moments are when the Holy Spirit is moving. Not only that, God gives us people to keep us on track in our faith with Him. Those people could be our friends, family members, or mentors. You might have some of those in your life already. These people are part of our faith community and can help us grow in our faith.

Having a faith community to support us is important. That is evident by the Pentecost scripture. Acts chapter 2, verse 44 tells us that the people the disciples were able to minister to through Pentecost “lived in a wonderful harmony, holding everything in common. They sold whatever they owned and pooled their resources so that each person’s need was met.” Belonging to a faith community allows us to strengthen our faith together. When we get with other believers, we can share our stories of God’s work in our lives. With those, we can teach and motivate one another. 

While we can support one another through our faith communities, faith is not something that is passed from a parent, a pastor, or a friend. It is not inherited or gifted. Faith should be evidence of a person’s unique, personal relationship with God. It should be cultivated from personal hours spent reading our Bibles, and one-on-one conversations with God through prayer. Like Noah and Isaac, and others long dead, we each need to let ourselves be vulnerable in God’s hands. We will all have our personal trials and tribulations. Times in our lives where it’s a struggle to keep going. And while the people around us can help us get through those times, it is the personal relationship we have built with God that will ultimately carry us through.

So, when my mother died was there something wrong with my faith? Did I not have enough faith? Was I not open and vulnerable enough? I don’t think so. I think, like all humans, I am limited in my view of the world. Time exists mostly in the present and there is no way for me to determine my future. But God is all-seeing and all-knowing and he has good plans for our lives. I realize now that even after my mother’s death, I was still able to have faith.

Romans 8:28 tells us that “All things work together to them that love God, to them who are called according to His purpose.” I took that message to heart, and I had faith that life would be okay. Even now, I continue to have faith that life will be okay. Instead of dwelling on the loss, my family and I decided to turn our eyes to the positive side of things. Our mother was now in heaven! While it is true that she never got some of the achievements and celebrations she wanted here on earth, she got the one thing she spent her whole life fighting for. She got to join her Creator in heaven and that is a bigger gift than anything anyone here could have given her. 

God has good plans for our lives and, believe it or not, He didn’t create us for suffering. Jeremiah 29:11 even tells us: “I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord, “Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Trusting in God may seem hard but if you make sure to build a constant and consistent relationship with him, relying on Him becomes easier and easier. The more we practice our faith, the more natural it comes. One of the best ways to practice our faith is through prayer – just as the apostles engaged in spirit-filled prayer on the first Pentecost. Because of this, I’d like to close my message today with a time of prayer…

Spirit of the Living God,
Fall afresh on us.
Refresh and deepen our faith.
Renew our hearts, minds, and spirits,
so that we may serve You with joy. Amen.

Grace Idikwu, Youth Sunday Message
May 19, 2024